I have not read a Christian book for over a year, which is something I missed doing in a busy last 12 months where I was trying to complete fieldwork, preparing for presentations, getting reading for my OTD program, and making a name for myself in OT in autism. In the midst of all this whirlwind, I decided to take a step back- to take inventory of what I have done, what I will do in the near future, and what I will do over the course of my OT journey- with my student journey soon coming to a close and the professional journey waiting on deck. After reading that book, I felt like someone throwing some cold water at me in a good way. Why? Even though I have accomplished a lot in OT and that I seem to have a clear direction of where I wanted to go, I feel it's a good time to this so that I can make a game plan for the professional phase of my OT journey. After all, I have dealt with some incredible highs and lows. These diverse experiences allow me to connect with the overachieving peers in our profession, as well as those who are struggling to find their ways in our profession. Also, I have come to know and embrace the autism community, even in times of disagreements. Through the 3 years of my student journey (though 1 year longer than wish I have), I have come to appreciate my tough times more than the good times. Not only I endured the typical student struggles (and then some), but that these tough times were what shaped me to be who I am in OT. It is through the tough times that taught me the value of resilience and perseverance. It is through the tough times that taught me to never forget my humble beginnings when I first stepped into OT school, as I came to OT school without knowing anything about what OT is... and that I had thought my dreams of being a licensed occupational therapist was very slim (after having failed 1 level 2 FW and learning my diagnosis of Asperger's a month later). What made me think all that? Well, it was a book called Wake Up Generation: You Have a Life... How Will You Use It by one of my favorite Christian artists- Paige Omartian (formerly known as Paige Armstrong). It is a Christian devotional book mainly targeting teens and young adults. I purposely bought that book because one of her songs played a key role in my recovery experience. Moreover, for someone like me, I feel it's very helpful to hear certain things presented in another way. By reading Paige's book, I am able to get that. Not that I don't like to eat, sleep, and breathe OT all day, sometimes it just helps to take a step back and objectively see what my OT life has transpired since I started OT school. One thing I took a close look at is- the moment I have completed all my OTD requirements a year from now. After all, I know I will be an interesting commodity in the OT community in autism- not that I am not now, but I can help the OT community in this area in more ways than I can now. At the same time, perhaps the greater autism community will take notice of what I am doing in OT. All this will mean more time in the limelight, which is something I have been getting accustomed to since October 2010. In a sense, it is great that I have some perks through my OT fame (since that is how I found my preceptor for my OTD project). But in a sense, this made me more conscious about myself than I want to. In fact, because I have been portrayed as a "superstar" or "OT celebrity", I hate to screw up because I feel people who know me don't expect me to. I asked myself, "When can I truly be me? Sure, I want my peers to be proud of me if I ever do something great. But, I don't want all this 'fame and fortune' change who I am as a person. I just want to be the real me." So, what I have decided is I continue to set my sights high, especially in pursuing things that I believe can inspire the autism community. To me, satisfying both of my occupational roles as autism and OT advocates is the main priority of my OT career. Meanwhile, I will continue to work at providing quality time to those who want to talk to me in person in OT. After all, the OT community has provided me a lot. I also know that I am extremely fortunate comparing to other adults who are on the autism spectrum- in my baseline, prognosis, and the kind of care I have received. What I am aiming to do for my OTD project and for the rest of my career simply are just little payments for the great work OT has done for me from the inside and out. By doing this, I also know that I can provide a positive impact to those who are directly impacted by autism- in not only believe "miracles" can be possible, but also that there is someone in OT who understands them advocating on their behalf. I know Paige will be proud of what I am aiming for, even though I know it is unconventional in comparison to what most (if not all of) my ex-classmates are doing after they get their licenses. I recommend that this "reflection exercise" is a must for those who are counting their last days of their student journey or when their OT lives are in transition. As there is a Chinese saying (using the best of my translation abilities), "You can see how big and wide the sky and the sea is. All you got to do is to take a step back." Of course... one of my bucket list items is to actually meet Paige one day. I am sure we will have a wonderful time- not only talking about our spiritual journeys, but also perhaps introduce her to OT and the great work that our profession does (since I see PT mentioned in the book, but not OT).